


Our Capacity for Love

by aqpuppy



Series: Adventure Zone Inspired Drabbles [2]
Category: RuPaul's Drag Race (US) RPF
Genre: Canon Compliant, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, POV Second Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-15 03:29:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28806588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aqpuppy/pseuds/aqpuppy
Summary: "Our capacity for love increases with each person we cross paths with throughout our lives and with each moment we spend with those people. But too often we neglect that part of ourselves in favor of others, and by the time we realize just how important it is, we find ourselves with fewer folks around to practice with." - Griffin McElroyA companion piece to "Hear That Babe, We're Legends".
Relationships: Shea Couleé/Sasha Velour
Series: Adventure Zone Inspired Drabbles [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2111967
Comments: 6
Kudos: 6





	Our Capacity for Love

**Author's Note:**

> After writing "Hear That Babe, We're Legends", the idea for an All-Stars 5 fic from Sasha's perspective felt needed. Plus the idea for more drabbles based on The Adventure Zone monologues and random quotes from that podcast (and maybe other D&D series if I get to it?).
> 
> I'd recommend reading "Hear That Babe" first.
> 
> Also general thing is that is *is* from Sasha's perspective. I just felt like doing a different writing style with her and it just stuck.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy.

You always loved Shea, no matter how much you tried to deny it. In fact, you’ve had a crush on her for a while. Not romantically, of course. You have a boyfriend, a dog, and a stable career. What more could you want? 

Well, that answer was easy enough. Companionship is decently placed among the hierarchy of needs. The moment you saw her on a screen you wanted to befriend Miss Coulee as best as you can. As luck would have it, one summer and weeks of filming later, your wish came true.

You were surprised at how much you two clicked in retrospect. Since that first challenge, there was always some spark that only ignited further into a vast blaze of friendship. You and Shea practically became inseparable, and to believe it started over a sexually charged broccoli salad. It was almost becoming a cliché whenever you paired up together, but no one seemed to mind too much. 

You two were connected to the point where you’d flirt with each other… platonically, of course. It was fun. Seeing fan's reactions was one of the best parts. They were having fun, and you were having fun and that was what mattered.

Sasha didn't want this to end. Minus the stress and production assistants, she wanted this time with Shea to last forever. But, as it is wont to do, a finger on a distant monkey’s paw curled.

As much as you didn’t want to admit, you figured something like this. Producers loved drama and what could be more dramatic than making two friends lip sync against each other. Seasons earlier, it worked between Raven and Jujubee. You hoped they'd pull a double shantay with that, but a deep part of you knew you couldn't be saved. Only one had to come out on top, and you were proud of that outcome.

Seasons ebbed and flowed like the tide as new winners were joining the ever-widening circle. As this new season was announced, you were ecstatic! That was your friend up there and you were rooting for her until the end! You couldn’t wait until she joined you in the circle; you’d easily accept with arms outstretched. You would give Shea the biggest hug the next time you saw her in person. 

But this was starting to change as soon as you watched her season. You appreciated all of the little nods to your work. It felt like most of the time, Shea would talk about the finale and how the effects of losing had tampered with her sense of self. Had you been this myopic that you had no idea how you’d feel? You two had been so intertwined, yet you still knew nothing about that.

_I should have asked_. You constantly thought during those confessionals. _I didn’t know it would get that far._ You tried calling her every week, but you ended up quickly familiarizing yourself with Shea’s voicemail.

As episodes came down, the mentions of you didn’t bother you anymore; you were just happy that Shea was still in the competition. So you stopped calling so often; it would be best for her to give her some space.

You were surprised that Shea didn’t win the standup challenge; after all, she could make the phone book sound like an invigorating epic and it was a mystery how the judges couldn’t see that. In due time, they were going to get their heads on straight.

When Shea won, you were the most ecstatic you had been throughout the weeks of airing. She got her joy back, and a hole in her heart had been filled. The moon to your sun finally left its three-year eclipse. In that moment, you decided to do something you hadn’t done in a while.

You’d call her.

Your hands trembled slightly as you dialed her number, but in the end you were just happy she responded.

“So congratulations…” You eased into the conversation with a smile on your face. Your friend responded with a simple apology when she was ready. “Don’t worry about it. You’re good. It was a year ago-”

"But what I said about you! It was a spur of the moment and... you know how stressful filming gets-"

"It's okay. You can breathe now."

You two continued to converse into the evening of catching up, jokes about roses and wigs, plus sweet nothings.

“Sasha, I tried to make you proud.” Shea reiterated, fearing that the last few apologies didn’t count towards anything else proposed.

“And you did. If there’s anyone who’s at fault, it’s me. I shouldn’t have called so much I didn’t even know-”

“Now look who’s frantic,” Shea joked.

“I know… I should probably take my own advice and breathe. This is the first time I’ve had a chance to relax since Nightgowns aired, and yet I still didn’t do it.” You laugh, and Shea laughs and you continue conversation.

In that instance, the lines once again blurred so wonderfully between platonic and romantic. Some would say it was fate stringing you two together to become each other’s soulmates, but that wasn’t quite it. Your relationship, which had been so integral to your life and your career, transcended that very concept. Even in some instances, the red string cannot account for all of the time spent talking and learning so much about each other.

And that was what mattered.


End file.
